Be moved by the personal insights in this brief, honest essay from embryo adoption mom Tina Gibson. Her oldest daughter, Emma, is pictured above and was once the longest-frozen embryo to successfully come to birth. Emma was frozen for 24.5 years before Tina and Ben became her parents through a frozen embryo transfer (FET) at the National Embryo Donation Center. In 2020, Emma’s own sister, NEDC baby Molly, broke the record. Emma spent more than 27 years as a frozen embryo. Tina penned this essay a few months before Molly’s birth.
This week is National Infertility Awareness Week and it breaks my heart to think about all the women facing infertility right now. I have so much to say about it because so many people don’t understand. Infertility is HARD. It’s so easy for me to see God’s goodness and miracles now, but when I was in the thick of it? It was hard. That’s the only word I know to describe it.
Why Does It Hurt So Bad?
I know what it feels like to beg God to give me a baby for YEARS, I know what it feels like to cry with my husband over and over, and I also know what if feels like to cry when he isn’t around because I didn’t want him to know I was hurting so bad. Why does it hurt so bad? I don’t know. Maybe it’s because it’s something you just expect to happen, or maybe because there’s always someone around you complaining about kids that you wish you had, or maybe it’s because people are ruthless with their comments. I don’t know, but it’s hard.
I got married young and we knew from the beginning there was a 99.9% chance that we couldn’t conceive. Thank God it didn’t come as a shock, as it does for so many women. We were married for 7 years before we had Emma and had actively prayed for her for 4 years. So many doors closed on us. We had lengthy conversations about how our lives would be without kids and if we should just stop trying. It’s amazing now to see how God had this perfect plan for us, but when you’re in the midst of it, it is so hard to see.
The Hardest Thing I’ve Ever Dealt With
Infertility is HARD. It just is. The hardest thing I’ve ever dealt with, but now that I’m on the other side, I see how much those years shaped me as a mom. When I walk by my living room at night on my way to bed and smile at all the toys, it’s because of those years. The extra patience that I have for her is because of those years. I remember the days when I begged God for what I have today and I know the gratitude that I feel every single day is because of those years.
Would I wish this on anyone? Not for one tiny second! However, I would do it all again if it brought me Emma Wren. One day, when you have a lot of time, ask me about the miracles that we saw in the process, because we saw them over and over again. God parted the Red Sea for us, and he can do the same for you. ❤️ Ask me about my God -He changed our lives- and then ask me about embryo adoption, because it did, too.